Monday, July 27, 2009

Episode 2...


THIS ONE GOES OUT TO MY LONE READER... MR Suri.. aka laindi photographer
2500 bucks and a brand new TAVERA... was what it took for us to get a cab to pursue the travel to Srinagar.
Trust me the journey was worth every single rupee we spent. Counting the stops...Omlette n Pakoda at Nandani, Patisa n BACARDI COKE In Kud, Rajmah Chawal in Peerah...Ah mnouth watering experience...
Not to miss...Suri clicked some 138752 pictures enroute to Srinagar. I have about six of them.LOL... The travel was pleasent as we are going zig zag towards the valley...The driver saam kept reminding us that all wasn't well in the valley.
But singing, "Man mein hai vishwas, poora hai vishwaas", we kept inching towards glory. And it wasn't before we reached Pantha Chowk that we figured out...All was actually not well. The serenity was comendable but the empty streets and shut shops were saying a lot.
Next stop...Bhalla Roadways aka Chachu's office.. Where we change cars... safety purpose... as in Underworlld hindi flick... Ten more minutes and we are at my place... nice & Cozy & SAFE.
The day ended with our introduction to wazwan.. the authentic kashmiri food..
Please stay tuned for the next episode.... Pari Mahal, DAl LAke, Tujji, Pahalgam, rain and a lot of cold winds... Til then from all of us here at Radio Kashmir...Take Care

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Up Up & Away

Those bones at Kangdori were f**kin scary...but the kahwa at Tangmarg bus stand left an aroma in my mouth cavity. The trip to Pahalgam was NOISY but the first view of the valley was one that I had never seen before...

Welcome to RADIO Kashmir as I take you on seven day trip from Delhi-Kashmir-Delhi visiting destinations that we had set out for and a few that we unfortunately missed...Well I'll try to stay away from negative words lke afore mentioned in the rest of the telecast. Not to miss the amazing food we had on the vacation in the Himalayas & Pir Panjals

Episode 1: Delhi To Jammu - The RAJA Rajdhani

A 20 minute bike ride from my place including three halts - 1. ATM - cash... CHECK... 2. Departmental Store, paper soap, sanitizers...CHECK and 3. BACARDI WHITE.. CHECk an Im at the New Delhi statio where the Jammu Rajdhani awaits me.

Two more characters in the telecast besides me n BACARDI, Ms SRA and Mr Suri aka laindi photographer find a convenient spot near the Bank of Baroda ATM where I can find them.

Once together, we headed for the platform, got into our compartment where Suri uttered the word 'Bastard' for the first time (PS: he said that on more than a few occasions during the trip).

Quickly I skip the night where we savoured the NOT SO GREAT Rajdhani food and VAdilal Icee Cream (U can only find it in Rajdhani now) and a Classic Menthol courtesy Ms Sra, we reached Jammu Rly Station at around 7 in da morning.

Surprised as I was.. we saw a Nescafe just outside the station open at 7 am, where we had morning coffee and decided the way forward....... To be Continued

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Wasting away in GLORY!!


2009.. ten months and counting...my days at my first job. As I approach my first appraisal I think about things that were good and others that could have been better. Having lost count of a handful number of fun moments, I still wipe off my face...full of perspiration. Tired at work?? May be...infact NO. I am not tired at work, I am tired of working.


Doing the same thing over and over again and trying to make it new ebvery time. Aah it's a lie. Its like re-inventing the wheel. Telling the same story twice, thrice and keeping on telling the same thing.


They say there will be a new day, a new beginning...but when...it seems like the end of the tunnel.

I know I can certainly do a lot more. As some one told me...make the most of this time...coz in his words this is prime time.


On self-introspection I feel I need to pursue some goals...aim at a bigger aim.... There are innumerable questions in my head but sadly no ANSWERS.


Don't know where I am heading...that's why wasting away i.........!!!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

How Toilets were introduced in the Indian Railways



Okhil Babu's letter to the Railway Department:
"I am arrive by passenger train Ahmedpur station and my belly is too much swelling with jackfruit. I am therefore went to privy. Just I doing the nuisance that guard making whistle blow for train to go off and I am running with 'lotah' in one hand and 'dhoti' in the next when I am fall over and expose all my shocking to man and female women on plateform. I am got leaved at Ahmedpur station.This too much bad, if passenger go to make dung that dam guard not wait train five minutes for him. I am therefore pray your honour to make big fine on that guard for public sake. Otherwise I am making big report to papers."
Okhil Chandra Sen wrote this letter to the Sahibganj divisional railway office in 1909. It is on display at the Railway Museum in New Delhi. It was also reproduced under the caption "Travelers' Tales" in the Far Eastern Economic Review.
Any guesses why this letter was of historic value?
It apparently led to the introduction of toilets on trains!!

THE PUNJABI ALPHABET: REVISION Course

A is for Adjust. Punjabis will always ask you to ‘Thoda Adjust kaar low ji’

B is for Backside, and it has nothing to do with your bum. It is an instruction to go to the rear of a building, or block, or shop or whatever.

C is for Cloney and it’s not a process for replicating sheep, nor is it George’s last name. It is merely an area where people live e.g. Defence Cloney.

E is for Expanditure. Punjabis are never shy of spending money - the latest cars, gadgets, marble floors: their ambitions are always expanding.

F is for Fackade, and even though it sounds like a bad word it is actually just the front of a building (with backside being the back,of course).

G is for Gaddi, and the way a Punjabi can pilot his gaddi puts any F1 driver to shame (If the Grand Prix does come to Ludhiana there’s no way Hamilton, Alonso or Kimi can overtake Balvinder, Jasvinder or Sukhvinder di Gaddi).

H is for Ho Jaoga Ji, and the moment you hear that you have to be careful because you can be reasonably sure it’s rarely going to happen.

I is for Intezaar, and to know more about it see ‘P’.

J is for Jindagi, and if there’s one person who knows how to live life to the fullest it’s a Punjabi.

K is for Khanna, Khurana, Kapoor, etc., the Punjabi equivalent of the Joneses (e.g.’Keeping up with the Khuranas’)

L is for Lovely sister of Happy, but unfortunately she almost never is

M is for Mrooti, the car that an entire generation of Punjabis were in love with.

N is for No Problem Ji. To find out how that works see H.

O is for Oye, which can be surprise (Oyye!), a greeting (Oyy!), anger (OYY!) or pain (Oy oy oy…).

P is for Punj Mint, and no matter how near (1 km) or far (100 km) a Punjabi is from you, he always says he’ll reach you in punjmint.

Q is for Queue, a word completely untranslatable into Punjabi.

R is for Riks, and a Punjabi is always prepared to take one, even if the odds are against him.

S is for Sweetie, Sandy and Sonu, who seem to own half the cars in NCR.

T is for the official bird of Punjab : Tandoori chicken.

U is for when you lose your sex appeal and become ‘Uncle-ji’.

V is for VIP phone numbers @ Rs 15 lakh and counting.

W is for Whan or Whay, as in ‘Whan are you coming ji?

X is for the many X-rated words that flow freely in all Punjabi conversations.

Y is for ‘You nonsense’, when anger replaces vocabulary in a shouting spree.

Z is for Zigzag (Please refer to G & M).

Mai kya ji : Have a good day Ji!

!!I laughed my pancreas out the first time I read it!!

A is for Awpheesh (as in Office). This is where the average Kolkakattan goes and spends a day hard at work. And if he works for the 'West Bengal Gawrment' he will arrive at 10, wipe his forehead till 11, have a tea break at 12, throw around a few files at 12.30, break for lunch at 1, smoke an unfiltered cigarette at 2, break for tea at 3, sleep sitting down at 4 and go home at 4:30. It's a hard life!

B is for Bhision. For some reason many Bengalis don't have good bhision. In fact in Kolkata most people are wearing spectacles all the time.

C is for Chappell. Currently, this is the Bengali word for the Devil, for the worst form of evil. In the night mothers put their kids to sleep saying, 'Na ghumaley Chappell eshey dhorey niye jabe.

D is for Debashish or any other name starting with Deb. By an ancient law every fourth Bengali Child has to be named Debashish. So you have a Debashish everywhere and trying to get creative they are also called Deb, Debu, Deba with variations like Debanik, Deboprotim, Debojyoti, etc. thrown in at times.

E is for Eeesh. This is a very common Bengali exclamation made famous by Aishwarya Rai in the movie Devdas. It is estimated that on an average a Bengali, especially Bengali women, use eeesh 10,089 times every year. 'Ei Morechhey' is a close second to Eeesh.

F is for Feeesh. These are creatures that swim in rivers and seas and are a favourite food of the Bengalis. Despite the fact that a fish market has such strong smells, with one sniff a Bengali knows if a fish is all right. If not he will say 'eeesh what feeesh is theesh!'

G is for Good name. Every Bengali boy will have a good name like Debashish or Deboprotim and a pet name like Motka, Bhombol, Thobla, etc. While every Bengali girls will have pet names like Tia, Tuktuki, Mishti, Khuku, etc.

H is for Harmonium. This the Bengali equivalent of a rock guitar. Take four Bengalis and a Harmonium and you have the successors to The Bheatles!

I is for lleesh. This is a feeesh with 10,000 bones which would kill any ordinary person, but which the Bengalis eat with releeesh!

J is for Jhola. No self respecting Bengali is complete without his Jhola. It is a shapeless cloth bag where he keeps all his belongings and he fits an amazing number of things in. Even as you read this there are 2 million jholas bobbling around Kolkata - and they all look exactly the same! Notethat 'Jhol' as in Maachher Jhol is a close second.

K is for Kee Kaando !. It used to be the favourite Bengali exclamation till eeesh took over because of Aishwarya Rai (now Kee Kando's agent is trying to hire Bipasha Basu).

L is for Lungi - the dress for all occasions. People in Kolkata manage to play football and cricket wearing it not to mention the daily trip in the morning to the local bajaar. Now there is talk of a lungi expedition to Mt. Everest .

M is for Minibus. These are dangerous half buses whose antics would effortlessly frighten the living daylights out of all James Bond stuntmen as well as Formula 1 race car drivers.

N is for Nangto. This is the Bengali word for Naked. It is the most interesting naked word in any language!

O is for Oil. The Bengalis believe that a touch of mustard oil will cure anything from cold (oil in the nose), to earache (oil in the ear), to cough (oil on the throat) to piles (oil you know where!)

P is for Phootball. This is always a phavourite phassion of the Kolkattan. Every Bengali is born an expert in this game. The two biggest clubs there are Mohunbagan and East Bengal and when they play the city comes to a stop.

Q is for Queen. This really has nothing to do with the Bengalis or Kolkata, but it's the only Q word I could think of at this moment. There's also Quilt but they never use them in Kolkata.

R is for Robi Thakur. Many nany years ago Rabindranath got the Nobel Prize. This has given the right to all Bengalis no matter where they are to frame their acceptance speeches as if they were directly related to the great poet and walk with their head held high. This also gives Bengalis the birthright to look down at Delhi and Mumbai and of course 'all non-Bengawlees'! Note that 'Rawshogolla' comes a close second!

S is for Shourav. Now that they finally produced a genuine cricketer and a captain, Bengalis think that he should be allowed to play until he is 70 years old. Of course they will see to it that he stays in good form by doing a little bit of 'joggo' and 'maanot'.

T is for Trams. Hundred years later there are still trams in Kolkata. Of course if you are in a hurry it's faster to walk.

U is for Aambrela. When a Bengali baby is born he is handed one.

V is for Bhaayolence. Bengalis are the most non-violent violent people around. When an accident happens they will fold up their sleeves, shout and scream and curse and abuse, "Chherey De Bolchhi" but the last time someone actually hit someone was in 1979.

W is for Water. For three months of the year the city is underwater and every year for the last 200 years the authorities are taken by surprise by this!

X is for X'mas. It's very big in Kolkata, with Park Street fully lit up and all Bengalis agreeing that they must eat cake that day.

Y is for Yesshtaarday. Which is always better than today for a Bengali (see R for Robi Thakur).

Z is for Jebra, Joo, Jipper and Jylophone.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Well...It's True.. Isn't It???

Some Facts which are very true!
1. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.


2. To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy.

3. The road to success??.. Is always under construction.

4. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.

5. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.

6. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.

7. Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak.

8. Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works.

9. If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried.

10. You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.

11. Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.

12. As soon as you mention something?? if it is good, it is taken?.If it is bad, it happens.

13. He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.

14. If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? the bus is still late.

15. Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.

16. When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.

17. If you have paper, you don't have a pen??. If you have a pen, you don't have paper?? if you have both, no one calls.

18. Especially for engg. Students--If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.

19. You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.

20. The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.

21. After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.

22. If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.

23. Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker.